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When somebody accidentally puts you number one on their list of hottest women, it’s only fair you show up to their party dressed like this to let them know what a horrible mistake they’ve made. Yeah, okay, it’s not like Lindsay Lohan is deformed, but there’s no way she should be number one on anybody’s list of hottest women. The only list she should ever top is Most Likely To Misspell Cat.

Original post by The Superficial - Because You’re Ugly

Lindsay Lohan and Calum Best got into a huge fight at the Soho Grand Monday night after Lindsay accused him of cheating on her. The two started screaming at each other in the penthouse and then somehow ended up in the lobby. A source says:
“Calum’s clothes were torn, and after a few minutes, they got back into the elevator and went back to their room,” said one onlooker. Lohan seemed unfazed by reports of her British beau canoodling with another girl in the islands Friday night - but Best’s raunchy behavior at Cipriani Downtown on Sunday might have sent her over the edge. Our spies saw Best “collecting numbers from all the models” every time Lohan’s back was turned.
Additionally, last week a room-service staffer claims he saw Calum in bed with another girl when he was asked to restock their minibar around 4 am.
According to our source, Best […]

Original post by The Superficial - Because You’re Ugly

Paris Hilton’s jail sentence has been cut in half from 45 days to 23 due to “good behavior.” Additionally, they’ll be giving her her own special needs housing unit separated from the other prisoners.
“This was decided because of her high profile,” Whitmore told Reuters. “She will do fine if she follows the rules.”
I’m not going to argue with the special needs housing unit, because, well, that sounds about right, but what is this good behavior they’re talking about? The only thing she’s done so far is show up late to her court hearing. Oh, she didn’t murder anybody? That’s another 23 days off. At this rate they’ll end up sending her on a Hawaii vacation and apologizing.

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Original post by The Superficial - Because You’re Ugly

Britney Spears was spotted at Dominic restaurant wearing a leopard print bra under a very see-through shirt. It’s not like anybody’s expecting her to show up in her Sunday best, but Jesus. I know prostitutes with better fashion sense than this. And, well, let’s be honest, probably less sexual experience.

Original post by The Superficial - Because You’re Ugly

Jenna Fischer (Pam from The Office) fractured four bones in her back Monday night after slipping on the marble steps at Buddakan.
A friend said she spent the night in St. Vincent’s hospital and had to cancel an appearance on “Late Night with Conan O’Brien” and a Harper’s Bazaar shoot. Fischer’s rep, Lewis Kay, said yesterday she’s “doing much better and is resting at her hotel. Her husband [director James Gunn] flew in to be with her.”
She’s lucky she’s not paralyzed. And how did she fracture four bones from slipping? Is she made out of glass? I got hit by a truck once while napping in the street and all I suffered was a headache. Although the truck exploded on impact and I think the driver died. Maybe all the ladies are right. Maybe I am too manly.

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Original post by The Superficial - Because You’re Ugly

Britney Spears has posted a message to her fans on her official site, saying:
The reason for this letter is to let everyone know that their prayers have truly helped me. I am so blessed that you care enough about me to be concerned and will continue to live in this brighter state with all of you by my side during this trying time. We are all lights of the world and we all need to continuously inspire others and look to the higher power. You are all in my prayers.
Godspeed.
Love, Britney
What the hell is she talking about here? And who is she addressing? I’m surprised she didn’t thank all the unicorns and invite everybody to the party she’s throwing on the moon.
NOTE: I travel at no speed but ludicrous speed.

Original post by The Superficial - Because You’re Ugly

Jodie Marsh attended the photocall for her MTV reality show “Totally Jodie Marsh: Who’ll Take Her Up The Aisle” in which she looks for a husband in a nationwide casting call in the UK. And really, who wouldn’t want to marry this? The class. The dignity. The great fashion sense. But most of all the class. It’d be like marrying the Monopoly man, only much much classier.

Original post by The Superficial - Because You’re Ugly

Kim Kardashian showed up to the Sons of Hollywood party looking completely different than we’re used to seeing her: not covered in pee! Just kidding (but really not). I don’t know if it’s the red lipstick or what, but her face is almost unrecognizable. Like that punk I beat up the other day for hitting on my woman. He claims he was just asking the time, but I know the truth. I saw the way he tapped his wrist and inquisitively asked, “Do you have the time?” I would’ve been an ass not to beat him up.

Original post by The Superficial - Because You’re Ugly

52-year-old Bruce Willis is reportedly dating 23-year-old Playmate Tamara Witmer, who is only five years older than his daughter Rumer. Tamara says:
“He’s got the sexiest voice!” she says. “He’s so smooth and suave. I don’t mind the bald head. He’s really good looking in person.”
As long as she’s cool with it then so am I. If you can show me a 52-year-old that could turn this down I’ll show you a 52-year-old that’s a homosexual.
A few more shots of Tamara Witmer after the jump.

Original post by The Superficial - Because You’re Ugly

Britney Spears is allegedly so mad at her mom for urging her into rehab she’s cut off all communication with her and even refused to visit her in the hospital on Mother’s Day.
“Britney has cut off all communication with her mom,” a “friend” of the 25-year-old singer told the National Enquirer. “She’s gone from calling Lynne ten times a day to flat-out refusing to speak to her.” Lynne, 52, was hospitalized in southern California recently when a bout of the flu turned into pneumonia. The Star is reporting a similar story. “Britney says her mom betrayed her and she refuses to get over it,” the source told the Enquirer. “When she was told to give her mom a call, Britney said: ‘I’m busy, I have my own kids now.’ ”
Britney Spears has always had really good judgement and makes great decisions, so I’m sure this was for the […]

Original post by The Superficial - Because You’re Ugly